Random  Thoughts...
胡思亂想

  I

  If you mixed vodka with orange juice and milk of magnesia, would you get a Philip's Screwdriver?

  Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

  Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

  If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

  Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns?

  If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

  When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?

  Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

  Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.

  When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?

  Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?

  Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

  Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

  If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?

  Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?

  "I am " is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do " is the longest sentence?

  If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and  dry  cleaners  depressed?

  Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?

  Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?

  If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

  If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes?"

 

Key  words

這篇笑話有許多雙關語,只可意會,不可言傳。

vodka (n.)伏特加酒 

milk  of  magnesia     鎂氧  ( 指氧化鎂的白色粉末或結晶 )

Screwdriver (n.)伏特加橙汁雞尾酒

    Philip's  Screwdriver (n.)一種工具

out  of   whack    故障的、運作不正常的   click   發音

disgruntled (adj.)不高興的 

lingerie (n.)女性貼身內衣  click  發音

broker (n.)股票經紀人 click  發音  

      broke  破產        broker  好像在指「破產的人」

racist (n.)種族主義者  

defrocked (adj.)免去某人的神職

I do 結婚典禮時,新郎和新娘說:「我願意!」    

disbar (v.)吊銷律師執照 

dry cleaner (n.)乾洗店

  press 燙平衣服   depressed 沮喪的

Oriental  (n.)東方人