Random
Thoughts...
胡思亂想
I
If you mixed vodka
with orange juice and milk of magnesia,
would you get a Philip's Screwdriver?
Why do we say something is out
of whack? What is a whack?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as
adults enjoy adultery?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

Why do women wear evening gowns to
nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns?
If love is blind, why is lingerie
so popular?
When someone asks you, "A penny for
your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens
to the other penny?
Why is the man who invests all your
money called a broker?
Why do croutons come in airtight
packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
When cheese gets it's picture taken,
what does it say?
Why is a person who plays the piano
called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called
a racist?
Why are a wise man and a wise guy
opposites?
Why do overlook and oversee mean
opposite things?
If horrific means to make horrible, does
terrific mean to make terrible?
Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
"I am " is reportedly the
shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that
"I do " is the
longest sentence?
If lawyers are disbarred
and clergymen defrocked,
doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians
denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons
debarked and dry cleaners
depressed?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as
"4's"?
Why is it that if someone tells you that
there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them,
but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch
it to be sure?
If you take an Oriental
person and spin him around several times, does he
become disoriented?
If people from Poland are called
"Poles," why aren't people from Holland called
"Holes?"
Key
words:
*這篇笑話有許多雙關語,只可意會,不可言傳。
vodka (n.)伏特加酒
milk of magnesia
鎂氧 (
指氧化鎂的白色粉末或結晶 )
Screwdriver (n.)伏特加橙汁雞尾酒
Philip's
Screwdriver (n.)一種工具
out
of whack 故障的、運作不正常的
click
發音
disgruntled (adj.)不高興的
lingerie (n.)女性貼身內衣
click
發音
broker (n.)股票經紀人 click
發音
broke
破產
broker
好像在指「破產的人」
racist (n.)種族主義者
defrocked (adj.)免去某人的神職
I do 結婚典禮時,新郎和新娘說:「我願意!」
disbar (v.)吊銷律師執照
dry cleaner (n.)乾洗店
press 燙平衣服 depressed 沮喪的
Oriental (n.)東方人
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